I had dropped my students off for lunch and made my way into my colleague’s room. I found her on the floor in a ball of pain. Racing to her side, I asked what was wrong. Tears slide down her cheeks as she said that her stomach pain was too great to stand. This had not been the first time she had trouble with stomach pains, but this was far worse. I called the nurse and I waited by her side.
“They’re going to fire me,” she began to sob.
“No one’s going to fire you,” I reassured her. But as much as I tried to comfort her, her sobs turned into 
panic and her pains became worse. I quietly spoke to her about breathing and focusing on relaxing until the nurse arrived and called an ambulance. When the school principal arrived, he was concerned. But once this teacher had left the building, he confided to us that having a sick teacher all the time was becoming a problem. By law he could not get rid of her. I gritted my teeth and turned to grab both classes for the remainder of the day. My colleague had Crohn’s Disease.
When the teacher had been hired she did not disclose that she had a chronic illness. Why would she? She knew that if she had shared this little secret, that her chances of being hired would be next to none. So she stayed quiet until her flareups got so out of control that she had to finally tell her boss what was going on… and by law she could not be fired.
Like that teacher I, and many around me, suffer from a chronic illness. I did not ask for the illness, nor do I want the illness… but still I have it. Lucky for me, my Lyme’s Disease did not hinder my ability to work, but for other it does. For others, it is so much worse.
Every day in America there are thousands of people suffering silently from chronic illnesses. They are afraid to let people know that the face they see each day is just a mask for what is really going on inside their minds and bodies. Every day they must find the courage to place their feet on the floor and propel themselves out of bed. They must self-talk their way through the steps of getting dressed, eating and taking care of others. And everyday they are faced with people rolling their eyes, questioning their abilities to work, and questioning if they are sane. Yes, you read that right… SANE!
Unfortunately, I have lived with someone very close to me that has dealt with chronic pain for over ten years. From a young age she had to deal with missing school, events and life experiences that her peers enjoyed. She had to visit doctor after doctor as they worked to figure out her disease. As her life progressed, so did her anxiety and pain. As a young adult she worries each day if she will have the energy to go to work, to maintain friendships and support herself. For the longest time she told no one of her illnesses. She was not embarrassed but afraid… afraid that she would not be hired, that she would not be given the big projects, would not get to travel, not be looked at as someone her bosses could count on. So she began working harder than anyone around her just to prove that she is worthy of the job she has. And in turn, she is rewarded every night as she returns home with more pain and fatigue than she experienced the day before. She tries hard to wear her “mask” of normalcy each and every day so that those around her will not question her dedication or find out her secret. But it is beyond difficult to hide such pain and it leaves a victim feeling alone and exhausted from life.
Many times, victims of chronic illness become even sicker over time. Their bodies begin to fail in other ways and what was once one disease is now a multitude of diseases.
I had a neighbor who at thirty was watching as her Lupus attacked every organ in her body. To the outside world she looked fine. She was pretty, smart, and a loving mother. But her secret was hidden behind her blue eyes of exhaustion. Her days were filled with trying to maintain a normal life while running to specialists almost every day. At first the neighbors whispered about the poor lady down the street that always seemed sick, and then the ambulance arrived and the whispers turned into gossip. It wasn’t until her husband reached out to a friend to explain their situation that the “talking” subsided. She had been alone in her pain, but now she had a network of friends there to help her out. She was forced to reveal her secret because the gossiping caused her far greater stress than the illness had. And a patient with chronic stress is a patient on the brink of destruction.
There are so many forms of chronic illness in our world that I often wonder if there isn’t one person around me not touched by it in some way. The odd thing about chronic illness is that no one talks about it openly. Many do not accept it as an actual illness even. I had someone say to me one time in a fit of desperation, I wish I had cancer instead. People understand cancer. People are sympathetic about cancer. There is an end with Cancer.
I was dumbfounded. I had never really thought about chronic illness that way. But the truth is, chronic illness patients get no sympathy. People often tell a sufferer to toughen up, stop complaining. They are told they are hypochondriacs, and that it’s all in their heads. Chronic illness patients must live with pain their whole lives… their whole lives! When you think about it, it is devastating. It is devastating because a suffer suffers alone, in silence with a secret they wish they didn’t have. And those around them that do know, must keep their secret too. It’s like one giant secret that shouldn’t be a secret at all.
As I grow older, I find that more and more parts of my body are affected by my chronic illness. But for me, I am one of the lucky ones. My illness arrived late in my life, after my confidence had been formed, my friendships strengthened, my work completed. But to those young, with years ahead of them, their only hope is to find a cure that will end their suffering. And in the meantime, people like me will educate others to not judge our sufferers, to give them strength not pity, and encourage them to ask for help. For having help, is having friends… and having friends means sharing the secret.
Support Groups for Chronic Illnesses: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/groups/chronic-illness
List of Chronic Illnesses found on Wikipedia
Addiction
Alzheimer’s disease
Atrial fibrillation
Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder
Autoimmune diseases, such as ulcerative colitis, lupus erythematosus, Crohn’s disease, coeliac disease, Hashimoto’s thyroiditis, and relapsing polychondritis
Bipolar disorder
Blindness
Cerebral palsy (all types)
Chronic graft-versus-host disease
Chronic hepatitis
Chronic kidney disease
Chronic osteoarticular diseases, such as osteoarthritis and rheumatoid arthritis
Chronic pain syndromes, such as post-vasectomy pain syndrome and complex regional pain syndrome
Depression
Dermatological conditions such as atopic dermatitis and psoriasis
Deafness and hearing impairment
Eating disorders[7]
Ehlers–Danlos syndrome (various types)
Endometriosis
Epilepsy
Fibromyalgia
HIV/AIDS
Huntington’s disease
Hypertension
Lyme disease
Multiple sclerosis
Myalgic encephalomyelitis (a.k.a. chronic fatigue syndrome)
Narcolepsy
Obesity
Osteoporosis
Parkinson’s disease
Periodontal disease
Postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome
Sickle cell anemia and other hemoglobin disorders
Sleep apnea
Thyroid disease
Tobacco Use and Related Conditions[7]
Cancers
Cardiovascular diseases, including cerebrovascular disease, heart failure, and ischemic cardiopathy
Chronic respiratory diseases, such as asthma and chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD)
Diabetes mellitus
