How to Prepare for House Guests

“I’m coming for a visit!” Five words that can excite or fright the average person. First off, what does that exactly mean? Are you coming to town and staying at a hotel or are you planning on crashing at my place? Good question, right? Well, assume that if you live in a really cool place that the latter is probably going to be the answer.

Don’t freak out, it’s not really necessary. Often times our immediate response to such an announcement is mixed at best. I have company all the time, and even though I absolutely love it, I find myself inundated with thoughts and questions too. Perhaps it’s not those words at all that give us a moment of apprehension or anxiety but the actual person that is delivery the words.

So what do we say and do to prepare for the happy visitor?

Rule Number One: Don’t say “sure, yay, can’t wait to have you” if you don’t really want the person to stay with you. Nowhere does it say you have to house someone in your personal space if you don’t want to. With that said, there are a few people that you might have to bite the bullet and let through your door… like your parents and grandparents, but everyone else can be steered to another place to stay. Simply say to the  caller, “As much as I would love to have you stay with me, I think everyone would be more comfortable with more space. I can find you someplace local and close by if you’d like.” This shows that you want them to come but you also need them to stay elsewhere. You can also say, “I’m so happy you are coming to TOWN, we have the best hotels and bed and breakfasts. Can I help you find one close to our home?” But what if they say, “I’m coming for a visit and I’m staying with you?” You say, “I’m excited that you are coming to visit, but to be honest, I think I would be a much better host if I put you up in a hotel or found you a reasonable hotel while you are here.” YOU do not have to house them if you don’t want. BE HONEST and tell them up front. Some people just can’t host for a myriad of reasons, and so you should do your best to be honest about this.

Rule Number Two: Breathe and make a list. To keep from feeling overwhelmed later, jot down the things you know you must do to prepare for a visitor (see below an example.) By using a list, you can delegate jobs to those that may live with you, you can keep a timeline and do things without feeling pressure. (Grant it, we all make the mad dash the day our visitors arrive freshening up our digs!)

Rule Number Three:Remember that you don’t have to ENTERTAIN the whole time your guest is in town. We all assume that we are so wonderful that our guests want to spend 100% of the time with us. Not true. Just as you are not used to being with someone 24/7, they are not either. So before your guest arrives come up with a simple itinerary for when you might be available to share time with them. (See example below)

Rule Number Four:Be Realistic! No one expects your home to be a hotel. (If they do expect that, then they should find a hotel and stay there.) But your guests do expect you to respectthem enough to have your home reasonably clean and welcoming. This means doing a thorough cleanup the weekend before they arrive and then doing what I call a “mother-in-law” clean the night before  or day  they arrive (a light touch  up.) IF shoes are sitting by the door or your toothpaste is on the counter… oh well! They probably have the same at their house! Remember that they live somewhere too and it isn’t always perfect every day.

Rule Number Five: Pets. If you have pets make it known to your guests… and be honest with them. If you know “Buddy” drools all over the place or “Mitzy” leaves dead animals as a gift, tell your guest. Don’t let them find out the hard way. It’s hard for a guest to act like everything is normal and keep a calm face when they are mortified! If you know your animals like to jump or are easily excitable, instruct your guest how to handle this BEFORE they arrive to minimize the awkwardness and your hurt feelings when your guest seems annoyed by your “baby.”

Rule Number Six: Be a host/hostess. Your guest will always feel uncomfortable in a foreign environment and a little guidance by you will go a long way. You both want to enjoy the time you have together and this is a sure way to make it happen. When your guests arrive, show them around your home, pointing out where to find food when you are not around, towels in case the ones you laid out are dirty, or a place where they can escape if they need some private time. Yes, this is important! If you tell your guest up front that you have put a television in their room in case they want to get a little down time this will “allow” both of you a chance to unwind during the stay.

Rule Number Seven:My favorite…. I learned from one of my sister-in-laws that a great hostess always reaches out to his/her potential guest before they arrive to find out their favorite drinks, food, toiletries etc. She always states to her guests that if she gets the chance she will try to provide a few things to make them feel more comfortable. This way if she can’t get to the store to get those special items she isn’t held to it…. but she always has my Pepsi when I arrive and I know they are a Coke family. IF you go out of your way to add a few personal touches, it not only makes your guest feel welcome but it will show that you actually took time to think about them during this special time together.

Rule Number Eight:Planning activities is a must for visitors. It does not mean that you to have a detailed schedule for every minute your guests are in town. What this means is, you need to give your guests options of things they can do with and without you. One way you can begin is reaching out to your guest to ask if there is anything in particular that they would like to do. DO NOTstate that you will get tickets or set things up etc. After all, this is their “vacation” and as such, they should be responsible for what they are doing and paying for. However, it is important to send them a list of things to do in your area or have them available in their room when they arrive. One friend of mine gave me the idea of having a little area of books, pamphlets, maps etc. of the area for my guests to peruse in the evening. The reason you need activities is to help keep everyone sane! It’s great to just hang out and chat, but if you live in a place like Hawaii… your guest won’t want to sit in your house all day looking at you. (Even if you are beautiful) Remember, you still have a life, and if you have prior obligations, let your visitors know in advance.

Rule Number Nine: Planning Meals… This is perhaps the most difficult part of entertaining guests. I’ll be honest, I usually buy tons of food and it’s still in my house when my guests leave. So here’s what I have learned… plan for breakfast at least. Almost everyone eats breakfast at my home when they visit. Plan on two dinners at your home for a week long visit… then be ready to eat out or run to the grocery at the spare of minute. BUT… remember that your guests don’t expect you to make an elaborate meal for them (unless you are a great chef!) If you can make a few meals ahead of time and freeze them,all the better. It is not your job to go broke feeding house guests, but you should at least make the effort to offer a few meals while they are in your home…after all, you would have to eat one way or another if they were not visiting you. Pastas and Grilling out are always a winner in my house!

Rule Number Ten: Have fun and enjoy the moment! This sounds simple, I know. But it is not easy to do when you are still working while your guests are around or when you have cranky guests. It’s even harder to do if you are constantly worried about everyone’s happiness and your over-tired yourself. So how do you relax???  When your guests arrive state right up front, ” Listen, I really want us all to have fun while you are here so let’s just be low key, relaxed and remember that we just aren’t going to worry about the small stuff.” AND THEN DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE SMALL STUFF!!! If little Johnny throws a tantrum at the pool, smile at your guest and say…”To be young again… no thank you” and laugh. And when a drink gets spilled on your new white couch, twinge only briefly and remember that a good “Spot Shot” burst will get it out or the local steamer… it’s not worth freaking out about. And when you breakdown in the desert, miles from the nearest car repair, start telling stories until help arrives. These are the things that you ALL will remember about this visit years later. Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to laugh about it? 

Now you have the ten rules to a successful visit by no doubt a very special guest! Enjoy and share with all your friends!

List to Do 

• Clean house – start with guest room, bathroom and kitchen, main living areas
• Send email with list of things to do in the area (make one up that you can add to and continue to send to others)
• Send an email requesting food preferences, any known allergies
• Mark on Calendar what days to clean what and when to grocery shop
• Clean out car, make room for luggage in trunk
• Wash sheets and towels for guest room or fluff them in dryer with a bounce to give freshness to them
• Send an email with days you are available to join them in an activity or two
• Think of each person and make sure each will be comfortable (especially true if small children are coming and you don’t even have a book in the house)

 

Itinerary

• Available to join breakfast if before:
• Lunch on these days:
• Dinner on these days:
• Days I can spend the whole day:
• Evenings during the week: